Sleepwalking

Sleepwalking, by definition, is a state of low consciousness where people perform activities that are usually performed during a state of full consciousness.  These activities are generally simple, repeated behaviors, but can be more complex.  I am only on day three of a 60 day partial fast, and already I realize that this is a great analogy of what I (and I suspect many others) have been doing for most of my life.

This fast has made me acutely aware of my choices.  I can no longer just "go with the flow", doing whatever comes naturally.  I must measure each decision against what I have committed to and see if it measures up.  Hmmm, sounds like something I should be doing anyway.  Even my failure last night has taught me.

Yes, day two and I already messed up!  We went to the movies and I had popcorn and a pop.  No it may not seem like a big deal to you, and it isn't according to my "normal" way of thinking, but I have chosen to walk another road.  Not only was the food not on my approved list, but the cost was crazy!  The good news is I live under grace.  So, I confessed it to God, asked for forgiveness, received His forgiveness, brushed myself off and am getting back to it!

I discovered the importance of setting my mind.  Whichever direction we set our mind to (I had already decided beforehand that I wanted a snack at the movies) that is what we will follow through with, no matter how much we argue with ourselves to the contrary.  Romans 8:1-2,5-9,12-13 says:

"Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, ² because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit who gives life has set you free from the law of sin and death.

⁵ Those who live according to the flesh have their minds set on what the flesh desires; but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires. ⁶ The mind governed by the flesh is death, but the mind governed by the Spirit is life and peace. ⁷ The mind governed by the flesh is hostile to God; it does not submit to God’s law, nor can it do so. ⁸ Those who are in the realm of the flesh cannot please God.⁹ You, however, are not in the realm of the flesh but are in the realm of the Spirit, if indeed the Spirit of God lives in you.

¹² Therefore, brothers and sisters, we have an obligation—but it is not to the flesh, to live according to it. ¹³ For if you live according to the flesh, you will die; but if by the Spirit you put to death the misdeeds of the body, you will live."

 

Much like the simple, repetitive activities of sleepwalkers, we do things by habit or because everyone else is.  This is a dangerous and slippery slope.  I have begun to be awakened.  The question lies in what will I do now?  Will I choose to move ahead into reality or shrink back into a semi-conscious state of ignorance and disobedience?  I have 57 more days.  Let the adventure begin!

Beauty Defined

Though the media would like us to believe they have the definition of beauty, they do not.  Having beauty is defined as possessing qualities that give great pleasure or satisfaction to see, hear, think about, etc.; delighting the senses. This can not be limited to a few people or things, but rather is as inexhaustible as creation itself!  For beauty has its origin in the mind of an infinite God. 

So what does nature teach us about beauty?  Variety and uniqueness are its hallmarks!  It is the difference between the plains and the rugged mountains or the sea and the arid desert that delight our senses.  What pleasure to sit upon the sand and listen to crashing waves, as they continue on as they have since the beginning of time, their tides marking the days and seasons.  What meditation is brought on by staring into the heavens with their vast constellations.  And who has not felt satisfied at the end of a day as the sunsets in its brilliant hues. 

And what about our desire to people watch?  You know you do it.  We can't help ourselves, as the differences fascinate us.  We are God's masterpiece.  Our very DNA shows that uniqueness is God's design.  It is purposeful and it is beautiful!  Even the afflictions and trials of our life can prove to be the refiners fire that brings forth pure gold. 

As a photographer, I have learned that "perfection" does not always make the best picture.  It is the clouds scattered throughout the sky that cause the most glorious sunsets.  And so with my life, I have seen the trials purify me by seeking to remove my pride and selfishness, revealing the beauty within, which is Christ in me, the hope of glory.

Praise God for His definition of beauty.  We are free to be who He made us to be, in all our uniqueness.  Our glory comes from His many faceted character being displayed in our lives, as we allow Christ to rule in our hearts.

Be Beautiful

I recently received this advertising mailer, from a clothing store in the mall, and was immediately struck by the statement on the cover.  It simply reads, "Be Beautiful".  I have nothing against beauty, but it was the inferred message that bothered me.

Behind the words is a model decked out in the company's clothes.  The message seems to be that by wearing their clothes you will be beautiful.  The world promotes beauty as being all about the outward adornment and fitting into some prescribed mold.  Though it deceives many, there is a fatal flaw with this line of thinking.  This ideal of beauty is not real.  Even if one could somehow obtain it, they couldn't sustain it!  Such a one would have to continually chase the latest trends (and at 40 the latest anti-aging products), obsess about their weight, and still remain unfulfilled, self-centered and exhausted!  Solomon was right when he said, "Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting". (Proverbs 31:30)  At least the world's idea of beauty is.

There is another form of beauty that lasts.  True beauty comes not from the outside, but from our inner character.  1 Peter 3:3-4 says, "Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes.  Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight."  This does not mean we leave no regard for our appearance, but rather we keep it in perspective and our confidence comes from who we are in Christ instead of our looks.

If you have ever been around a woman whose spirit is at rest, who knows her true identity, then you know what I am talking about.  For not only is this woman at rest, but she puts you at rest too.  There is no need to prove anything with her.  You feel comfortable.  You can be yourself.  Outward beauty alone can make people shy away, but inward beauty invites them in.  What kind of beautiful are you?

Wilson

Wilson.  That name may bring to mind different things depending on your age, like Denise The Menaces poor neighbor or the volleyball from Castaway or even someone you know.  When I think of Wilson, I think of an adorable, redheaded, one year old who melts my heart with one look.  A child who reminds me what simple devotion is.

He doesn't speak using words yet, but he doesn't have to, his eyes say it all.  He sits contentedly in your arms, trusting, looking into your face with adoration, as if you are his hero.  Wilson has reminded me of the adoration God desires from me.  A pure, simple desire to be content in His presence, looking to Him to be my hero, my Savior.

LORD, teach me to bask in your presence, content, trusting and adoring you!  May I lift my eyes to you and look upon your face with wonder and joy, not because of what you can do for me, but simply because you are you and you hold me always.

Solitude

 

Though I have not birthed any children from my womb, I have many children that I hold dear in my heart.  One of them, my sweet Annabelle, came to visit me recently while I was camping.

While my husband was busy working on some property we own, I was enjoying some much needed time alone.  Upon arriving to our camper and finding me alone, Annabelle declared, "Aren't you bored?". I think it only appropriate that I mention the facts.  She is 18 years old, from a large family and very busy with friends, work and college.

Albert Einstein put it well when he said, "I live in that solitude which is painful in youth, but delicious in the years of maturity".  I didn't always appreciate or enjoy solitude.  In my youth the idea of doing anything by myself, even shopping, seemed depressing. Time has changed this; has changed me.  But don't get me wrong, I still enjoy a good party and require "girl time" with my friends.

Sometimes it is simply a matter of needing to recharge, but my strongest desire for solitude comes from a calling of God, if I might call it that.   It is He who keeps calling me deeper.  A time to study and meditate on truth and what really matters.  A limiting of distractions and false ideas of happiness.  Time to worship and pray.  A contentment and desire to be in His presence and nothing more.

It is in these times of solitude that I find what I need to be of good to others, as Thomas Merton once said, "It is in deep solitude that I find the gentleness with which I can truly love my brothers. The more solitary I am the more affection I have for them…. Solitude and silence teach me to love my brothers for what they are, not for what they say".

Applying What you Learn

My husband, Michael, and I had a great opportunity this week to apply what we had learned in Sunday School.  We have been discussing God's will for our lives and though we have found much on the subject to debate about, you can't really argue with 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18, which says, "Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus".  However, it does fall into the "easier said than done" category.  It was time to take it out of the classroom and put our faith into action. 

So what was this grand opportunity we had placed in front of us?  Camping.  Yes, that crazy thing people do, where they actually pay to live below their means. Crazy as it may be, we were all in.  We previously bought a piece of property and Michael was going to be spending quite a bit of time there, so we decided to haul the fifth wheel out there and set up home.  Everything was going quite well until we plugged in to power.  Nothing.

There are a couple of buildings on the property and Michael had the power turned on to them months ago.  He had even used the power previously, so he was at a loss as to why it wasn't coming on.  He tried all he knew to do.  By this time it was getting late, and frustration was starting to set in with the setting of the sun.  This is when the scripture from that morning came to mind,  "I know I am supposed to be thankful, but...".  Sometimes it is hard to see.

Michael decided to call the power company and report the outage.  Within a few minutes we received a call back.  It turns out they knew about the outage (caused by a storm a month ago) but hadn't bothered to fix it because they didn't think anyone was using the property.  Oops!  They sent a crew out right away and within an hour or two we had power!

The moral is that if we hadn't gone camping and discovered the power outage, we would still be paying for power that wasn't even on!  We learned that prayer matters and though the power being out didn't seem like something to rejoice in or be thankful for at the time, it was.  A blessing in disguise.  Then there is the story about the lost keys...but that will have to be for another time.

LIfe Lessons I Learned From Running, Part Two

There is an old saying, "No pain, no gain".  Is this just a godless myth or an old wives' tale?  Now, while we must remember to keep things in balance, I think this saying does have truth to it, both in the physical and spiritual realm.  I know that the pain in my life has brought gain when I have allowed Christ to use it. 

If we want to be godly, then we must train ourselves (1 Timothy 4:7).  In 1 Corinthians 9:24-27 Paul says, "Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize?  Run in such a way as to get the prize.  Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training.  They do it to get a crown that will not last; but we do it to get a crown that will last forever.  Therefore I do not run like a man running aimlessly; I do not fight like a man beating the air.  No, I beat my body and make it my slave so that after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified from the prize."  And again, in Hebrews 12:1, he says, "and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us".  He obviously thought there was a connection to be gained from the metaphor.

So, the following are observations I have made while pounding the pavement:

1) Growth and change require hard work.  Our bodies are made to gloriously adapt and grow stronger when pushed to their limit.  And conversely waste away with complacency.  Remember the saying, "use it or lose it"? Our faith is much the same.  As we exercise it, it grows stronger and we are able to handle more.

2) We put in the time, but it is ultimately God who causes our bodies to grow accordingly.  It is his design.  Just as Proverbs 21:31 says, "The horse is made ready for the day of battle, but the victory rests with the LORD".

3) Our training depends on what we want to accomplish.  For instance, if I want to win sprints I train hard and fast, but if I want to run a marathon, then I train slower for longer, building endurance as well as speed.  So it is with life.  Make sure you are working hard at what you want to accomplish in the end.

4) You can't depend on feelings.  Sometimes you have to get out that door and train even when you don't want to.  And the joy comes afterward.  This is a huge lesson for marriage.  We may not always feel "in love" with our spouses, but we need to honor our commitment and in time we will feel the love again.

5) Running consists of different terrain.  Sometimes it is uphill, sometimes down.  Sometimes you run and sometimes you have to walk.  Some are more enjoyable than others, but there is benefit in it all.  So with life, circumstances vary, but we can learn to appreciate them all.

6) It is hard to be great at anything if you are spread too thin.  Look at an elite athlete.  They rarely do more than one sport and they spend an incredible amount of time on that one.  They are extremely focused.  Everything goes into this one goal.  Maybe that is our problem as Christians, we want it all.  Instead of being focused on Christ and his kingdom, we are trying to get all we can from this kingdom as well.  As a consequence, we aren't that good to either.

Maybe the greatest lesson came one afternoon after a particularly grueling run.  I made it through the run and all I had left was the cool down walk home.  But I was so tired.  I wanted to sit down and rest for a bit, but I knew that if I did I very well might not get back up!  So, I kept on going.  Willing my body to put one foot in front of the other.  I made it home!  And so it is with our Christian walk.  At times we grow tired and weary, whether it be from burnout or hurt feelings.  However, we must not give up meeting together.  Even if it means we have to crawl through the doors for a while and drag ourselves to Biblestudy or to our prayer closet.  Because if we give up, we may find our current spot not so bad and decide to stay there, giving up the glory to come.  Perseverance is the key. Galatians 6:9 says, "Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up".  So keep going...don't give up!